Isolated from the herd of wits and bullshit,
knocked over, by the choice of mine
By the choice of yours, I surmised
The onsetting dusk, I lamented;
For what it’s worth, I tried, mending
The broken bond, the shattered link,
Asphyxiating every ounce of my conscience
Of reason, now nearly lost, faded;
O thou confidante, my mate of ages,
Where thy friendship paled,
Faith vanished, yacht of trust sailed;
Leaving me here, belittled
By the mockery of circumstances,
You meandered into an abyss,
Never meant for me to wander;
Weathered, toiled & trudged, I have
To be where I resolutely stand, I tried
To pull you back from the chasm
In futile, for all in vain, at last I inquired,
I questioned – is this how it ends?
I prayed, not, yet if not otherwise,
Among the scarce choices,
I had to choose right, for the multitudes
That surrounds my mortal self, unaware you,
Blinded by basic human jealousy, it affronts
More than penitence, it outrages my senses;
Reminiscing the chronicle of obscured meaning
I now sing this ode to the end of an era;
I struggled writing this piece because I wanted to bring in as much clarity without being specific in depiction. This poem recounts my personal experience of recent times, which, as I recall, I have encountered in past too but this instance is much more intense. It felt like an unexpected blow to the fragile castle I was cherishing all this time.
I do not intend to incentivize over the broken bits but rather remind myself that it is a part of life. It hurts and it teaches me a lesson. It may seem irrational yet it begets rationality in my maturer self. It kills the hope yet shapes my expectations.
Author’s Note – I write about certain events on this blog because either they need to be told or I want to document them as learning experiences. I do not expect others to gain much from the later category, given their specific contexts. This is one such post. It has troubled me recently and I needed to vent out the feeling.