Decoding Moddison

It all started one night at 3 about a month ago. Three words repeated in a musical rhythm so as to resemble the distant calling of one’s own subconsciousness.

Takes me away, takes me away, takes me away…

It wasn’t someone humming in the next room or singing on their balcony celebrating this summer night. Instead, it was inside, trapped and here to stay till resolved. What is it exactly? I had to find out. But you see I was not alone in this quest.

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So, this is where we start. 1957. Not the year or maybe the year. Maybe it’s the lakeside home address or the supermarket on 1957 Avenue Rd. Could it be that? Whatever it is, it’s the lead we have to follow. You see, this is an excerpt from a bigger story although just as complete in its own right. I didn’t know it first.

Is that it? There is a beginning and there is an end and it feels logical throughout.

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Or is there more to it? I had this intuition, a gut feeling that said there was and my search should go on. I read further and there were scattered hints pointing towards its possibility. And that brought me to ‘Moddison’ by Milo Greene – an epitome of the audio-visual symphony which is bound to leave you mesmerized.

Directed by Chad Huff for Milo Greene’s self-titled album, Moddison takes you on a metaphorical journey of a writer’s struggle with his story through an interplay of reality and fiction. To tie it to a single perception would be naivety because it’s brilliant subtlety leaves room for multiple interpretations.

Before we move further, here’s a question that’s been bugging me for years –

In this world of ~7.7 billion people, how probable is it to conceive an idea totally unique?

The premise is simple. You think of something that’s never been thought and execute it from scratch. Starting from square one, you move up the ladder without any past references.

My diverse work experience has made me realize how every new idea has a certain predecessor to it. We essentially stand on the shoulder of giants (so it’s said) which let me tell you, is made up of big monuments achievements and small incremental improvements. They are not as whole as such. Every irreversible reaction comprises of infinitesimal reversible steps and it is nearly impossible to track where exactly did the transition happen. And more importantly, what guarantees that someone else hasn’t thought of it?

Why do I ask it now? Well, 2 years ago, I thought of something similar. A love story, all musical with nothing but ambient sound for transitions. Non-linear storytelling that plays with subtlety. Minimal characters and the eyes show more than their actions. Hazy B-rolls, flashbacks, amazing romantic chemistry and a drama of everyday life that yields a tight narrative.

Watching Moddison made me realize if I had been my best version of a writer, this is what it would have turned out to be. I never completed the story, for one there was always this uncertainty of it ever getting made into a video. Also, I couldn’t make up my mind to hold up to the crazy expectations I had for the characters.

What if you fall in love with the character you are writing?

No, it’s not just an infatuation or sustained limerence. It’s thousands of words about her, countless hours of imagining her in scenarios, visiting real places in her company, road trip, dip in the lake, running through woods, sitting on the couch beside the fireplace, carefully crafting her doll face through your typewriter and choreographing a dance through pencil, intimate moments of embracing her character so as to live through it – you lady, you take my heart away.

But gradually she evades your control, takes over the senses and starts overshadowing rest of the story. You cannot develop other characters because now it’s all about her. You are aware of her fictional identity yet her actions affect you in a real way. What do you do? Do you avert your mind? Do you confront the distraction? Do you change the settings so she becomes like the rest? Do you write her unpredictable end in the midst of the story?

Remember, it started with you hitting the road to be on a journey of quintessential search for a character which will infuse life into the story you had been unable to write. You meet someone on the way, not exactly the one you needed but certainly an inspiration. Some physical characteristics transfer over and an alternate story is spun. You two meet at a store and then all the aforementioned things happen. The problem started when you wrote yourself into the story.

Now there exists a fictional version of yourself indistinguishable from your reality. The intention of ending a character has to transfer into certain physical action in the fictional version. The inevitable happens and it’s not completely your fault. She is detached and dead. It’s the end but she needs a proper burial, doesn’t she? Where do you go? The first place where you had gone when you two first met for real – the lakehouse. You are on the journey on the same road, in reality, restless like before, seeing similar things on the side as if the search is on once again for a new character with the end of previous one and the cycle continues till you break of it.


Why did I choose a video released almost 7 years ago to write about today? Did it really deserve a separate post? Well, apart from all the things that are incredible about ‘Moddison’, it also re-affirmed this esoteric co-dependency of music and visuals for me and how their symbiotic enhancement leads to an interwoven fabric of metaphysical symphony.

I remember watching one of Peter Mckinnon’s video about his tour to Epidemic Sound’s office and one of the creators told him that he usually watches video clips in order to make music. That’s exactly the opposite of what we, as video makers, do. While shooting a scene, there is usually a tune in our head which guides the shot – the camera angle, lighting, transitions, duration – everything. But that’s not how it’s done in a professional setting (for the most part). Clips are shot and then the music is made accordingly which was a surprising revelation to come out of my previous internship and watching tons of behind-the-scenes on YouTube.

May was filled with amazing music discoveries and my playlist grew subsequently. From The Oh Hellos‘ lyrical interpretation of C.S. Lewis’ The Screwtape Letters in Dear Wormwood to Maggie Rogers recounting her Alaska journey but Aditi Dot takes the cake. There are just so many but once again I would like to express my astonishment over the immeasurable breadth and unfathomable depth of music that exists – there is something for every mood and every emotion. It can evoke emotions that weren’t there, to begin with. Music is the purest medium of expression and it just so happens that we are transcended to a moment of detachment where the line between reality and dreams is blurred.

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The perks of hanging around in the right corner of YouTube. Also, the recommendation algorithm has got surprisingly good recently.

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Celestial Happiness

I have a vivid memory of being absolutely content, the most peaceful and oddly happy I have been in recent times, even though for an ephemeral moment. And all of this because of an app.

Who would have thought?

We all have, on an average, 70-80 apps on our phone, right? For how many of them can you say that it gives you joy? Apparently not many, I assume. In fact, our experience has been contrary. Well, I have one and I’ll tell you why.

But for you to appreciate the intention, we would have to do a little time travel. Ready?

It’s sometime around December. Winter is at its full swing and the wall clock is ticking 2:35 AM. I have just finished my work for the day and put my laptop on hibernate. I got off my chair, ready to sleep. But you can see something is not right. There is just so much unease. I have had a series of painful days, had frequent dates with disappointments and it reflects on my weary face.

It’s pin-drop silence of the night. There is no sound except occasional barking of the street dogs and a spinning fan. Yeah! a fan and no, it’s not here or anywhere near my home (who would operate a fan in this chilly weather?). It’s a distant wave, carried over by the wind, attenuated to its last breath, now barely standing to make an ambient sound. Contrary to this, my mind is in complete turmoil, totally chaotic.

Remember any movie scene where everything is going calm and serene and suddenly there are noisy flashbacks and then back to the present. Yeah! that’s how it would have looked if you could see me and then inside my head back to back.

There is my younger brother, sleeping on the bed. The cutest little being. I lie down beside him and hold his tiny, warm hand in mine. I am wishing, I am praying for it to give me the strength to pass through yet another night like it always does. I can’t sleep because I don’t deserve it. And like most of us do, I open my phone and there is this notification –

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So there is this football field-sized, 100 billion dollars incredible machine floating above us. For those who don’t know, it’s called the International Space Station and it is equipped with crazy high-definition cameras which beam back live view of our planet.

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International Space Station (ISS) 

I open the notification and there it is, our gigantic blue planet, rotating, and revolving (although not apparent in this frame), going on its course like it has for past billions of years. There is no music. In fact, there is no sound at all. There are no laughs or cries or screams or calls that make it there. All there is, are the breathtaking views as it passes over the Pacific Ocean, then ice covered Antarctica, the illuminated countries in the night time and lands covered in clouds in the day. It’s wheezing past over them faster than we humans could ever go here on earth.

I keep watching this stream unfold for minutes and suddenly my frantic gaze starts searching for something, almost subconsciously. The ISS was passing overhead my region and so I thought, even if the cameras might not resolve me and other people from that distance, I should be able to spot my problems.

Yeah! my problems. Apparently, my worries felt much bigger than the physical self, so it must be here, somewhere.

No matter how hard I looked, I couldn’t find it. How insignificant were they that I couldn’t see them from just 400km above?

And just like that, I felt a peculiar calm within. I was neither laughing nor smiling but I was oddly happy. It was different than all the other time I have been happy and this made me question if there was any equivalence between the two.

Gradually, I transformed into an amorphous being and blended in with the airglow that wraps the earth. I was the aurora over the northern hemisphere, dancing with the charged particles trapped in earth’s magnetic field. Then I broke free and got along with that tiny Hydrogen atom floating indefinitely in space. I was infinite.


There are two ways to reach the stars –

  1. You make an elaborate scenery inside your head. You fill it with the planets, stars, asteroids, comets and tiny little ions. You can make the binary system like two friends holding hands spinning around the circle, rejoicing. You can eliminate the bad stuff like the black holes, the pulsars, and all the explosions. There is no reason for it to be vacuum so you can fill it whatever you want – air, candies or your favorite fragrance (subsequently particles). You can hop on the cloud carpet and whizz past the galactic course and interplanetary garden. You can have it all. All you have to do is dream.
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A still from the movie ‘5cm per second’

  1. You dream, you imagine, you study and realize that it doesn’t just have to be inside your head. The secrets of the universe are guarded by certain physical laws whose key lies with precise mathematical calculations. The tryst for exploration has propelled humanity to venture into unknown and we must continue that endeavor.

Mind you, neither of them is easier than the other. If you adopt any one of them, you might as well be true to it.

I get to do both. By night, I dream of the world beyond and by day, I work on bringing those dreams to reality. Two worlds blend together. My dreams were grounded in reality to begin with. And that way, the stars feel all the more close.

Desperately, reaching recklessly toward the sky. Launching that massive object in search of something, almost overwhelmingly far in the distance.

I have felt my celestial bliss and superlunary happiness being an earthling. I have seen the worlds, just like our own, which are not so apparent to my “human” eyes. I have caught glimpses of the distant galaxies playing with Hubble’s images. I have traversed through interstellar space and looked back to our pale blue dot and realized – there is no reason for all the emotions to be confined on this fragile planet. It is so unfair this way.


Additional Notes –

  1. I almost completed this post once which I had been writing for the past 4 days but then because of the technical glitz with WordPress editor, the entire post got deleted. I couldn’t retrieve it even after multiple attempts. So, I rewrote this version from all the things I remembered.

In a way, this post is a tribute to an app but also so much more. Also, I don’t use ‘ISS HD Live‘ often so as to not overwhelm myself.

  1. The feature image is of Astronaut Bruce McCandless II performing the first untethered spacewalk during the mission STS-41-B. I wonder if he was scared to float into oblivion or the happiest he has ever been. Did he feel his celestial happiness?

  2. While we are on the topic, something interesting happened a few weeks ago. On March 2nd, SpaceX launched its inaugural Dragon2 capsule on DM-1 Mission. This spacecraft is meant for astronauts which brings up a new era of human spaceflight. On Sunday, March 3rd, it was about to dock with the ISS. I was watching the entire live stream and the docking almost felt like a scene from the Interstellar. At that instant, I knew I had to make this and so I did –

https://twitter.com/OrangeDurito/status/1102184114600333313

I posted this tweet in reply to Elon Musk’s tweet. Soon enough, it started gaining momentum and then I went to sleep, not knowing what I would wake up to. Overnight, my tweet exploded. There were hundreds of comments, thousands of retweets and my phone notifications kept going off. Senpai Musk himself has retweeted it and for the whole next day, I was kind of trending on the nerd Twitter 🙂

It was kind of distracting but I also realized how much power does a small creation hold. People got to realize how a sci-fi movie, released just 5 years ago, has been turned into reality by genuine human effort. We are living in revolutionary times indeed.

Power Spectrum

Author’s Note – This was an experimental post where I prompted my readers to take a walk with me and had a one-way “conversation” about things I concern myself with. Some musical pieces, few video essays, messages from Twitterverse, the Kickstarter campaign and a lesson of life. I originally intended to keep this up for 24 hours but later extended it to 45 hours because we were having so much fun (or was it just me?).

When I write a post, several things are taken into consideration which somehow influences the content that makes it to the final cut. I can’t exactly put the finger on a single reason but it’s constraining. I just wanted to come out open – unrestrained, unconcerned of the consequences, unmindful of what my words would entail for others – just being true me and yet keeping it within the threshold of my comfortability.

This was a little different than what usually goes on this platform. I’m glad that I did this because where is the fun if things are not innovating, right? 2019 style.

So, thank you to whoever read this while it was online and for those who missed – well, I’m always up for one to one conversation. All you have to do is to tap that send button 🙂

I guess I can’t take back this song. Seriously, Illenium’s music is pure magic –

When The Odds Are Trolling

Have you ever taken a stand on the situation and shouted – “how the heck did this happen?” or sighed – “huh! what were the odds?” or, or frowned – “this is not what I expected”? Well then, you have got a company here.

My friends from the spaceflight community would know this –

18th December 2018 (UTC timing) – With 5[1] back to back rocket launches scheduled, this day was going to be written in history. The entire December has been a party for us space nerds but this was like a double bonanza. It has actually started feeling like we have ushered into a new era of space race.

But, but, the lauchapalooza turned into scrubapalooza when 4 out of 5 launches got scrubbed for 4 different reasons.

SPACEX – Falcon 9 with USAAF GPS-III 2 satellite – Out of family reading on first stage sensors

Blue Origin New Shepard with NASA Payload – Ground infrastructure issue

Arianespace – Soyuz CS01 mission – Bad weather conditions

ULA Delta IV Heavy with NROL-71 satellite – Scrubbed due to high winds

ISRO GSLV Mk-II with GSAT-7A satellite – Launched half hour later than first scheduled time but within the launch window

 

Huh! what were the chances of that? Let’s do a little bit of maths here, should we?

A rocket can either launch or stay hold on a particular day. So 2 possibilities.

Summing it over 5 independent launches, the probability of that all of them would be scrubbed is –

(\frac{1}{2})(\frac{1}{2})(\frac{1}{2})(\frac{1}{2})(\frac{1}{2}) = \frac{1}{32}

Ok, things are little weird with binary possibilities because compliment of \frac{1}{2} is also \frac{1}{2} and in any case, the probability would be \frac{1}{32} . For accuracy sake, we should actually take Probability of Go into account for each of those launches. The result would be an even smaller fraction considering weather wasn’t much of the issue for three of them. In a sense, nature actually picked the option which was the least probable.

At the time of writing this post, SpaceX has attempted its GPS-III launch for the 4th time in 5 days and it has been scrubbed again. By the time I would be posting this, hopefully, they will have a successful launch.

But this wasn’t the inspiration behind this post (although, it certainly contributed to some content and an interesting start, in my opinion). The topic first came into my mind at one cold morning of early December when I was standing at the train station. It was an overnight journey and I had another train to catch a few hours later. So I separated myself from the crowd and got to the waiting area. While standing there, I looked around and suddenly it struck me. The scenery felt rather odd.

I have been to that place numerous times before but that day it felt like being caught in the wee hours when it was still getting ready. I do accept that it was more of an internal feeling than an external cause yet it got me thinking – what are the odds of me witnessing it like this? It wasn’t even a planned trip.

Later that day, I took the most defeated walk of my recent memory. A plethora of emotions turned, twisted, collided and merged inside my head as my feet traced the road which stretched to eternity. I felt totally helpless, for now, I held a secret I couldn’t have divulged. On the other side, the usual place of my retreat wasn’t the same because of a sudden turn of events. I wished I could be a recluse, just for that day or the day later. Yet at that moment, I knew, I was the only strong bond holding all loose ends together.

You know those voices at the back of your head which shout the least favorable but probable outcomes? The one we shut down because either we don’t wanna face it or those we think are irrelevant – chances of later being less. What’s the way of safeguarding yourself? Would you turn and run away or would it take it head on as it comes?

There have been far too many such instances recently which led me to re-evaluate the odds of mere speculations. In a sense, this entire year has been like that. Facing the least expected. Fighting the odds which knocked on my door. I was cornered into my little space, confined in seclusion until I turned, looked it straight into the eye and decided to fight. Let’s see what all I can remember for the recap –

I started this year still working in a so-called core company. It was a well-respected Govt. job and I am grateful to it for giving a start to my professional career but it sucked the soul out of me. I constantly felt like I was downplaying myself but it paid well because of which I was finally able to finish my student loan within a year of graduating – that was my biggest relief (people spend years buried in debt). I started out at one place got transferred to another place in the second quarter and finally, after months of scrutiny, I resigned. Seriously, don’t get stuck in a shitty job and get out while you can. Life is too short but weigh your liabilities carefully before you take the risk.

I got a coveted fellowship but took a conscious decision of not taking it. It was after I took a hit of the quarter-life crisis. Relaxed, enjoyed with my bio-design buddies and traveled to a new place to stay with my friend while I applied to different jobs there. It felt like a tug-of-war between my fate and destiny. Things didn’t materialize according to my expectation but settling with alternatives meant neutralizing the risk I had taken. For two months, I fought with the question of ‘what actually that I should be focusing on?‘. Somewhere in between the process, I realized, I needed to re-calibrate my strategy to be able to do things I really want to do. Specialization is for ants but one should develop a strong core-skill first. Other things can be outsourced.

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Sometimes you find your answer in unexpected places. Courtesy – Explosm.net

Owning to my responsibility of an elder brother, I came back to look after my brother’s preparation for upcoming exams while I turned my focus towards building a portfolio & planning for graduate studies. I realized that the break would be a little longer because application deadlines approached faster than I could have caught up. On the bright side, I have got time to gain research experience (although it has to be at the mercy of professors I have been mailing). This break has been a bitter-sweet phase but I got to consolidate my future career plans.

Somewhere in February, my school friend called me to talk about this idea about a 360-degree travel experience platform that he has been working on. I liked it and went on-board. For the next 2 months, we worked most part of the nights. We had a working product ready and hence, triplou.com was born.

Working on a startup besides full-time hectic job was a challenge and it certainly took a toll on my physical health. But it was all worth it when we saw the hits counter rising. We entered into few startup competitions in hope that it would bring us recognition (the cheapest and least expensive method of gaining credibility). Didn’t make it to some even after hefty write-up and a concise pitch-deck. Well, that’s how these B-Plan competitions go but it doesn’t lessen our worth. We are now in the finals of one – looking forward to it.

I met my family once in January when my brother’s son was born and then again when we celebrated my parents’ 25th anniversary. I took my niece for shopping and brought her favorite dress with my own money. Held my brother’s daughter like she is a part of me while she slept in my lap – the absolute best feeling of my entire life.

It was also a time to look at relationships from a critical perspective when I understood how each of them rests on a fragile delicate balance. The string is tightened by compromises made on both sides. Also, when we start romanticizing someone, somewhere along the line, it ceases to be about the person and start to be more about the very idea of that person being in our life. It’s not worth it if it is not reciprocated and you should rather spend time on things that make you special. Some people are non-linear humans after all. This story also inspired the plot for my upcoming short film ‘That Thing About Lost Chances‘.

The test also covered the syllabus of friendship when my best friend and I took the opposite stand on an issue which led him to pivot into a totally different career field. Felt like it was for all the wrong reasons and I tried my hardest to convince him. He later came back to his senses and found a rational reason behind his decision. That was certainly a difficult period to deal with but I learned that you don’t easily give up on people you love. You simply can’t.

On the other side, our WhatsApp group ‘Kerala Expedition‘ felt silent for the most part. It was occasional buzz ground but went on frequent hiatuses. It has started dawning on me how our lives have taken different turns after college. We still haven’t made our trip to Kerala, hence the name continues. All four of us are now living in four different cities preparing to pursue four different careers (the odds man!). We didn’t get together at one place even once but I met two of them when I went on the Bangalore trip.

On the creative front, the first half was rather slow and I don’t recall any significant even worth mentioning. By March, I was finally able to churn out my first video of the year -‘The New Kind‘. I made it as a channel trailer promising more frequent videos with more unique stories. It peaked up the momentum afterward and I was all geared but it has come to an absolute halt by the end of the year. Tons of footage has still not made it to the editing room.

I had planned to make a video series titled ‘The Job Experience‘ for which I have been shooting for the past one and half years. I wrote the script, organized the footage and I had nearly finished editing the first episode but then I had to give it a rest. My focus was shifted for the above-stated reasons so I can say that the place and time haven’t been favorable. It’s still in post-production and now scheduled for next year.

For the first time, I got to collaborate with my friend who is an excellent cinematographer to edit his travel video. It felt absolutely amazing editing those beautiful shots and the entire video came out really good. Finally, I was done editing my sister’s wedding video after she continued pestering me for a year and I gifted it to her on Raksha Bandhan. I also shot sort of a documentary on a person in whom I saw a reflection of my own story but I couldn’t edit that too. We went to some exotic places in the land obscura to shoot. Face that These are secluded places which not many people know about, made the experience even more exciting

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This lake right here is in a bear-prone forest in the middle of nowhere.

Blog posts which were highly unpolished in the first three quarters finally started taking shape in the fourth, There are still some incomplete ones which I need to finish. My writing grew more and more personal and started piling up in my personal notes rather than ending on this blog. Twitter became my micro-diary but some things are still better left unsaid. I also posted more on my tech blog than the previous year but not to my satisfaction. My reading this year, which was only confined to articles on random sites, finally returned toward novels as I got to complete a few books. I missed my yearly goal by a large margin though and honestly, it sucks!

On the consumption side, I only remember finishing my long-awaited fourth and fifth season of ‘Silicon Valley‘ and now think it is the best tech-comedy ever written. I got hang of Reddit way too much in the first half but got in my senses in second. Later, I got obsessed with videos about ‘Exploration‘ – from Antarctic sea to Amazon forests, hidden civilizations and the world beyond our blue marble. It was a manifestation of the phase I was going through. I looked up for things which would help me become far-sighted and not get bothered by immediate circumstances. It rekindled my tryst with space.

I also watched a lot of SNL sketches (I mean a lot). Some excellent channels were added to my subscription list which taught me a completely new way of looking things. Peter Mckinnon continued to be my push to get things done while discovering Everyday Astronaut & BPS.space is certainly one of the best things that came out of my otherwise random YouTube surfing. I think I teared up watching Rory’s Lake Life 5.

Music continued to be a big part of my existence. It is the voice of my conscience. I ventured to explore even more genres and worldly music this year- not just confining myself to songs I can understand. Music transcends comprehension. I looked into the heart of techno through Charlotte de Witte & trance music through Armin Van Buuren, fell in love with lofi hip-hop – all thanks to Cubic Radiation!

It is mostly people who make up for off-screen experiences and this year, I got to meet some really great ones who accompanied me on this journey – from the toughest guy I knew who broke down when the time came for us to depart to the apprentices who came forward with all their heart to make my stay less miserable at an unknown place. I particularly remember one guy I met through my colleague who wanted me to make a dance audition video for him. He worked as a janitor in the day but slogged his night hours for dance practice because it was his passion. It was my absolute privilege to oblige and a great experience to count for before I left that place. I met several other inspirational persons who showed how talent nurtures among adversity and constraints.

In conclusion, a major part of this year was spent on daydreaming, finding means of escape. I started detaching from things that were near and longed for those which were so distant. Lessons were learned the hard way as I wandered through another year of adulthood without a guide. Let me tell you the crux of it all[2].

Getting what you want, how you want it, whenever you want it, is about three very simple things –

  1. Find something you want
  2. Find out how to get it
  3. Get it.

Only you can get the trolling odds to turn into your favor.


Note – I know this post went quite long but eh! Hope I could pack some lessons in those words. Wish you all a very happy new year in advance. May your wishes come true and you achieve greater heights. Have a great one! 🙂

Footnotes –

1. If we count ISRO’s GSLV Mk-II launch early morning next day.

2. These are not my words but absolutely nails the lesson. I took it from one of Mio’s vlogs.

The feature image is that of Starman on a Tesla Roadster on his way to Mars. It was launched on Falcon Heavy, courtesy of SpaceX. Couldn’t have chosen a better image for my year in review.


Song highlight

This song is attached to a very personal memory of mine. Last year, while I was listening to this song, I actually lived it lyrics (see the odds here?). At that moment I had decided that I have to make a video on it. I had the entire storyboard in mind and I gave myself till this year’s Christmas. Well, that didn’t happen.

It was relatively easier to make videos in college because someone or the other would volunteer for the role. It has been so tough afterwards since I’m not doing it professionally. Anyway, this song is still on my list, so if you or anyone you know would be interested in this project, hit me up. Peace✌

Shepard Toned

Just a little post to glide by.

I love music. I mean like a total freak. I constantly feel urge to put in my earphones and fade away from reality with the flowing melody. Also, as a film-maker, I’m in perpetual search for new tunes & new sounds.

My favourite musical artist is Illenium – just want to let you guys know and may be discover his ethereal discography.

So when MrSuicideSheep (he’s awesome!) prompted his subscribers (a whooping 9.3 Million base) to post underrated songs they love which has less than 1000 views, I knew I was up for an unexpected musical treat.

People from all over world, as wonderful as they are, started posting names of songs and artists they held as their little secret. There it was, like a paradise of floating rhythms, a musical heaven if you say so. I had to do something to retain all these names and give each of them a listen later on. This is what I did –

Songs List

Another perfect storm – burden

Nadav Cohen – Surround

Auram – Windrush

No TV no Radio – Anger

Vaboh – I’m sick of trying

Alt-j – Dissolve me/something good

Lua – Bright eyes

Essence – Somewhere down the road, we fell apart

Potsu and shiloh dynasty

Sigma – find me ft. birdy

Krowez (artist)

A himitsu flourish wither

Siames – the wolf

Left Boy – Security Check

Electro swing

Mako – Murder

Obstacles – Syd Matters

Doyle Perez – AWOL

She was – Dabin

Jay Sounds – Legacy

Rxseboy – college girl

MILKK

High Klassified – Stenio Keytar

Nightingale – Sara Kendall

Skullclub – Restart Again

May gaulin – op opa

Far from home – The Other End

David August, Sepalot – Duum Dilip, ENZU

Bad Habit – Royc3

Some days – Informal

Skill of a God – Wydron

Teflon Sega

June – sage Charmaine

Waiting in vain – rendy padugo

Last call by Lael

Energy 52 Cafe del mar

Summers day v2 by Jinsang

Sonder – Departure

Dancing – Aaron Smith (KRONO remix)

Elina – Wild Enough

Between Mountain – Into the dark

Ayia – water plant

Let’s Eat Grandma – Hot pink

Abi Ocia – Running

Broods (artist)

Shy by Hunny

Harrier – Bite the hell

Matt maeson – the hearse (album)

Billie Eilish

Cold skin by Seven Lions and Echos

Boy by ODESZA

Alec Benjamin

SEV Manoeuvres (Prod. Cashmoney AP)

Menke – Moln

Anica – Ravens

Deamn – Hypnotized

Code: Pandorum – Harakiri

Dear Rouge – Phase Album (Boys & Blodes and chains)

machineheart – Overgrowth

Finneas – Break My Heart Again

Dorox – Alone

Rival & Cadmium – Heartbeat (Fet. Veronica Bravo) (Ader Remix)

Stay or Follow – Many Faces

Blood/water by grandson

Doodie – sick of loosing soulmates

Crywolf & Illenium – Shrike

Path of a hero – niklas johansson

Shinigami – nobody

Muddy- Bubblegum

Shingo Nakamura – Nothing

Something Duderpatrullen

Wasted Ceremony – Without you

Midnight Kids – Find Our Way

Natural Selection by Bearos

DM Galaxy – Burial

Dominic Pierce – Still ft. Felivand

Movements – pham

Agnes Obel – Riverside

Tezatalks – find me

Passenger seat by clueless kit

Unitl Ruins – Survive

Fix this – soran

ALoan – No feat, no bravey

Au/Ra – panick Room

Ludo – love me dead

Modestep & Koven | Taken it All

Hookers – Tierra Whack

Ringtail – Cry alone

Bassnectar – Lost in the crowd (locoja remix)

Tom Odell

Emmanoodle

Love sick boys by Conan Gray

Kyko – Nature

AL3JANDRO – A street car named desire or bury me with my gold.

krydaform – drift  (slphr. remix)

Valentine HER

Magger we weren’t nothing

Friend (Acoutic Remix) – FRND

Fox stevenson – glue gun , fox Stevenson never before

Crisis by ZQH

Ryan Caraveo – Perfect World

Volor Flex – Wait

Denis Neve – Cold

Marcho marche – song of us

The Ali a intro

Chloe Adams and Once Monsters – Messed up

Khamsin & LeMarquis Leaving

Take/five Tell me

Weathers – Shallow Water

CelDro & Wholm – Essence

Kimya Dawson – The Competition

Two:22

ddu du du by blackpink

Flacko veli

Adam Jensen – Pretty Please

Holy other – know where

Christian French – superstars

Uncharted Memory by Maekc

Animadrop – in love with the night sky

killedmyself – the 1965 world cup (ft. taylor mrogan)

Come Alive by FMLYBND

Imagine Dragons – I bet my life

Tomorrows another day – CMA

There’s something special – Pokki DJ

Things to say – Youth in Circles

Playing safe- Martell

Olivia ruby’s songs

Subscape malet

Killboy

Mogili ft. NOVAA – Tonic Water (Snocker Cot remix)

So Happy Together by The Turtles

Waves by Chloe Moriondo

Some newer Savant – In Your Name

Open Field by Allamedah

Leuan-Honey Laveder

Anything by Xo Sad

Filly in the box – grey fire

Sweet Dreamer – Will Joseph Cook

Neffex – Summertime

Neffex – Welcome to the city

Old artist – Skrux, Crywolf, Mrfijiwiji, digital daggers, laura brehm, feint, grabitz, blackmill,

dabin, flexprod, TheFatRat, Gemini, Mako, PatrickReza, singurality, Skoto, stalgia

Mewmore Ogilt

Blan – Hold On

Robot Koch – Nitesky

Tritonal – Out My Mind (Apek Remix)

Zymosis feat. Katya Chilly – i zemili

Blank – Hold On

Edge by Tobias Lundergard

Mr FijiWiji – Lost Lost Lost

I’ve got you brother by Kodaline

Mewmore ‘Battle! Diantha’

Zaya – Exist in Me

J-Mox – Melina and Mahout Hunter

Omar Lynxs

Sourpatch Kids – Bryce Vine

Alcatraz – Oliver Riot

Nico and Vinz – So Bad

Eivor – Mjorkaflokar

Mochi – Taste of your love

Ina – you

Ina – Feels like home

Hats feat. Diana Fire

Ruth Calixto – Phoenix

Contessa – Running

Asaf Avidan (artist)

Whatever it takes- Imagine Dragons

Kobel – Don’t hit my line

Hippo army ‘dance flow’

Robert Miles- Fable

Wrong thing – Janine

Lady Bee – Homeless Heart

Les Castizos & Ally Eckmann – Get Over it

Delphi Freeman – My World

Vice by rkcb

Pheeniks silence slowed remix

Believed in you – Janine

Billy Raffoul – Unitl The Hurting is Gone

Finneas – Break my Heart Again

Sublab – Rose (Feat Mads)

Rings in Rings in Rings by A Shell in the sand

Halo – Boston Maner

Monster by Martin Hall (acoustic)

Ayreon – Merlin’s Will

All I know – Jandro (rap)

Mimi page – lullaby for the loney (yinyues remix)

Boing Boing – The Seige

That thing – Parrad

Polaroid – Cabadzi (French Band)

Tinder by limbo

Bad Dream Hotline – FOE

Clairvoyance Peak – Sound Remedy

Beautiful – The Nicholas (ft. San Holo)

Out of Order – Michl

Rynx- I’m alright

Drainpuppet – VEXT

Wonders (the AGST remix)

Alec Benjamin – Boy in the bubble

Eden – gold

Val – Mi amor

She couldn’t – Linkin Park

Spirit of the Lillies – Lockyn

Egs – Six days

Fall Into your from Cosmic Gate

Shinigami – a fallen angel

New Phynix ft. Matthew Steeper – Sparks

Katastro

Awake At Night – LOWES

Bad Tourist- Madelyn Darling

pxzvc – bad idea

Toybox redrapper

To the wonder – aqualung ft kina grannis

Midnight City – M83

I’m sad- Bassti

Romeo and Juliet Nino rota

Magic ft. Laladee- Capture (AZURA Remix)

New For You – Reeve Carney

Rei Brown

Heartafire

Copy cat – Billie Eilish

Djfriz – Dive

Cheery Coke – Blind

Bughunt – Morse

Shallou’s music

Yungblud

m i s t – eevee

Lexurus – Forever

Fluerie – Turns You Into Stone

Nekzlo – heading home

Kyddiekafka – Everlasting

Wisp x – mint

cYsmix – Fright March

WARR!OR & Eloy Smith – Come With Me

Chelsea Cutler

Rule the fire – IMLAY

Btsm – Fae down (crystalize remix)

Nine Roses – wiguez

Bro Safari – follow

Barnes Courtney

Haud U – Lil Peep

D3tail- Cloudy day

Lightspeed by Amadeus

Lost my mind – elley duhe

Illoquence and Rythmatical – If you’re the one

Christian Tierne – 26 Hours

Graves – Hilo feat. Boombox Cartel

Sublab & Wistful – My Love

Evanturetime – Sober

Home – resonance

Yuutsu – sun, slow

Casilofi – Little treasure

Kate Rusby

Simple Plan (emo rock)

Collide – Fytch

New Years Daya – Malevolence

NEFFEX – Take Me Away

Z Tapes

Forgive me – Miqu beats

STAHL – Chemicals

Rise – Jaydon Lewis

Unknow – the macabees

Khai dreams – fireflies

Portugal by the highs

HrDavs – Afternoon

Jellyfish – Yunomi

Every Other Lie – Oliver Has a Band

Sublab – Polarity Waves

2000f & jkamata – you don’t know what love is

N’to Croche

Khai Dreams – Find my way

The Greatest Showman soundtrack

Stars Come Out – Calvin Harris

Shinobi – cold without you

Luke Christopher – Believer/Tmrwfrvr Album/Roses

Three days grace

AJ super – nightmares

oomiee – Hotshot

Convolk

Jacob Lee

Adam sample – weekend

Bohnes

Mounika – Intro (slowed)

Sink or swim – Castor Tony

Dean – Insragram

Bleachers – Don’t take the money

Ember – KLP

Apstract – Fade Away II

Mushroom people – LOWWS

07 Nepal Kodak White

TENDER (artist)

Brothel, Siewalks and skeletons – Dissolution

OflYne – Rain

Karmic – Higher self

DJ Quads music

Sleeping At Last (artist)

Now’s new album ‘Saved’

Do You Miss Me At All – Bridgit Mendler

Gravity Bong – Meth Wax

Blue valentina- Nina

Soda on siphon – Elegant pumpkin

Kubi & Hubba – Boom

Zealyn – Limbic System

In love with a ghost please

Remix of leave the lights on – Meiko

Kungs – Be right here

The Tech Thieves – Gold

Cinders- 100 foxes

Bhones – middle finger

Guatemala swae Lee

Atic – astrid s

Antoje = TrahaGaine

The Galaxy feat. Sophie Simmons – Dangerous

Say hi to your mom (artist)

HAWN (on BANDCAMP)

LNLYK

We are the hearts

Alone Tonight – Digital Daggers

North Atlantic Explorers – Into the Blue Sea

Here’s what I got in return –

MrSuicideSheep.PNG

Thank you Sheepy! 🙂

Cafe Ecstasy

Tomorrow, I would be packing up my stuffs and head to Bangalore for a 3 day trip. Though it is for work, I’m going to meet two of my best friends living nearby. After college, we moved to different cities, working in different jobs, living different lives but what kept us connected is this undeterred bond we developed over 4 years. Here’s what I want to say to them –

Hey bros! I have missed you. I have missed your presence around me. I have missed taking those late night walks with you.

I have missed those pointless arguments. I have missed those logical discussions.

I have missed scolding you for classes. I have missed you scolding me for going to one without you.

I have missed your awkwardness. I have missed your ingeniousness. 

Though I know that we have left our place of rendezvous and living different lives, I’m gonna revive all those days when I see you. 

Edit – Well! I finally have something to show you guys. It took me more than 2 months of on & off editing to bring it into this form. It wasn’t hard because it was difficult to put these footage together, rather the emotion was hard to contain. You know that ecstatic feeling of meeting a part of you –

From Sharpened Nib Of My Mighty Quill…

Phhhhwwwwhat’s up everyone?

Good to see you all back here. Hope you’re having a good day. Before I proceed, let me take a moment to wish you all a very happy new year. It’s almost the end of first month. Darn it! I know it’s quite late but pardon me when I say that I have been working on some new stuffs for this blog (along with other pretty amazing things) – Wait till the drum rolls the 2018 style!

It’s been a surreal month as some of my previous Januaries of past years – kickstarting the new year, meeting some new people, meeting my family and of-course lots of work on both professional and personal end. I’m sure you’ll feel this renewed enthusiasm in my upcoming contents.

For the streak must continue, today I have few poems for you guys. These have been promptly written during the desperate breathing hours of my hectic work. Enjoy!

1. The One With Words

Scratch, Scribble, Doodle,

Strike, Hash, Shade,

Let your pencil

Scroll on sheet;

Roll on its nib

As it oozes of its tip;

When you move it between your fingers

And put it back to life,

When you drag it through, in yonder,

With all your might to write,

It may put scars on perchy paper,

Inscribe tool that no weaponry can beat,

Don’t mess with so-called hopper,

For my words can emblaze you like shit.

 

2. The One With Hidden Desires

How shallow is this ravenous self

That seek attention amidst the celebration;

Holding some secrets, keeping some mysteries,

Playful grin that reappears and stretches,

Reveals a story that’s best kept hidden

Within the comfort of your cushiony arms;

There it lie & pry,

On whatever remains of your shrinking heart.

 

3. The One With Winter Feelings

Petrifying wind & freezing water,

Shivering lives and burning carter,

Smoking without cigarettes,

oozing without cuts,

Stammering without inhibitions,

Murmuring without buts;

Loosing your hold ,

On what once was bold;

Bowing before the fury,

seeking the savior heat;

There lie thou helpless mankind,

Darn your pride which this cold shamelessly beat.